Yesterday was Weekly Weigh In Day and I found myself another 1.8 pounds lighter. It is sort of surreal to think about. I can sense that I am still not toeing the obedience line like I want/need to. A good deal of that is a simple weird fact: I have no idea what to eat?? So it is kind of an honest to goodness fudge-fest every single day. And my mind goes back to calories each and every time, which is NOT where I want to be. I mean, I know counting calories is a good place to sit temporarily to remind me exactly how much I am eating each day? But I cannot let it be the focus.
Sooooo, I have started to think about February. And changes.
First of all, I joined DietBet. In case you don’t know what that is, it is an organization where groups form, full of people each betting $30 that they can lose 4% of their weight that month. If you do, you and everyone in your group who also succeeds, share the pot.
More specific, I joined the group for Lexi, alias FatGirlFedUp, (https://www.dietbet.com/games/106103#how-it-works) which gathers thousands of bet placers. At the very least, if you make your goal and so does EVERYONE ELSE IN THE GROUP, you get your $30 back. But if you make your goal, chances are you will get more than your $30. It is worth trying for motivation!
Plus there is a cool app. I figured it was worth a try, and if it motivates me as I am hoping it does, I will keep doing it month after month.
Another thing I have to figure out is how to plan meals here at home and avoid eating out. Avoid is maybe too nice of a word. Don’t eat out. It is way to easy too grab something to eat while in town, and maybe part of the reason is that there isn’t food at home. I am the world’s worst at planning meals. I am the world’s worst at making myself do things I don’t want to do.
While those both seem so easy to accomplish and juvenile in their simplicity, for me, there are going to be hard. Shopping involves making menus, and for me the simpler they are the better. But I now see that too simple is not a good thing. And how do you know what you are going to be hungry for? I guess that is my big issue.
But this might be part of bringing my flesh into subjection to my mind. I wish I knew how to make it happen. Just get in the car, drive home. No stops. Come home and make a nutritious lunch. My mind cannot come up with a visual for it. Yet.
It has to happen though. For my health. For my budget. For my sanity. I wish I could reach off this page and have everyone who is in control of their food (instead of being controlled by their food) make a list of what they eat in a normal day.
I want to think meals could be as simple as a smoothie every morning, oatmeal for lunch every day…or vice versa…and that would suffice for the first part of the day, but that is what I was trying and it wasn’t working.
But is that because I have the habit of giving in to whatever my flesh wants??
I have a feeling that is the case!
So it needs fixed.
February 1st, I will have a menu in place, and I will follow that menu. This is the perfect scenario to put myself in a position where God can show Himself BIG. I KNOW that I am not capable, so it will have to be God in me.
Do I sound convinced?? I do not feel convinced, but I am going to make a plan and move forward in it. Cooking for one?? Eating raw? I do like the “Raw ’til Four” approach? I am such an overachiever that I want to write out 28 days of recipes, but that would be way over my head, for sure.
Oh, and there is Bright Line Eating, which I was super comfortable with. But it is just too much cooked food for me.
But I am going to commit to eating whatever I write down to eat. I am going to shop and have food here that is permissible to eat. and I am going to make my flesh be controlled by my mind , not vice versa.
I am going to continue on without sugar. and I am going to make sure there is no hidden sugar in things. I need to be more careful! I need to CARE in a greater way.
Oh, and I have to determine what Lent is going to look like this year, too. I have thought about adding something instead of taking something away, but nothing is coming out of the fog in either of those categories. I am going to read She Reads Truth Bible study for Lent with my daughter (long distance), and that is great. But I want to give up something that will be hard. Give up something that will truly be sacrificial. I want there to be a little pain involved. And I want to do that without whining.
I am sure I need to think more of myself and my abilities than I do. I have a bit more that two weeks to determine what Lent will look like, and a few short days to get a week of menus written out and a grocery list made!